The morning rush. As parents of school-age children know all too well, there are a thousand things to do, but not nearly enough time to do them. You’re running around coaxing and consoling, finding missing shoes and mittens, making breakfast, lunch, and coffee for yourself (if you’re lucky). Basically, you’re putting out one small fire after the next. On good days you’re a smooth-sailing superhero: part concierge, part short-order cook, part diplomat and conflict resolution-er. On rough days your job is the same, but every part feels like a struggle.
What is it about kids and mornings?
We grown-ups tend to forget what it’s like to be a kid. It’s a time when very little is in our own control: when big people constantly micromanage us, school our behavior, and tell us to wear matching socks or put our shirts on right-side out. Hey, maybe we wanted to wear them like that!
Like it or not, school mornings can bring all of these frustrations to a boil. The litany of tasks, the limited time and the perfectly natural desire to continue sleeping conspire to make mornings especially hard on kids.
Here’s what you can do about it
You want to get out the door on time, and your kids want to feel like they’ve got some independence. With a little preparation, patience and practice, everyone can feel like they’re getting what they want, so your school morning routine will run smoothly.
Preparation:
It’s the end of the day. You’ve just completed another parenting marathon. Probably the last thing you want to do is get started on tomorrow’s parenting, but if you can muster the energy, it’ll make the morning go smoother.
- Make tomorrow’s lunches and stick them in the fridge. If it’s mac-n-cheese-in-a-thermos day, set the clean saucepan on the cooktop and open the box of noodles. It might not seem like much, but to paraphrase President Lincoln, half a minute saved is one more much-needed sip of coffee.
- Have your kids choose and set out tomorrow’s schoolwear. Have them get their backpacks all ready to go and placed by the front door. When all summed up, small but meaningful steps like these not only save time, but they empower kids, too.
- A checklist of things that need doing can help kids feel in control in the morning. Prompt them with questions like “Do you want to do X first, or Y?” Your kids feel like they have a say in their routine, and you’re happy because everything gets done without a struggle.
Patience:
At first blush, patience feels like something you are with your kids, or something that you do for them. But really, having patience is for you. When you stress less, your kids do too, and hurried mornings will go a lot smoother. Being patient during the morning routine for school:
- Helps kids feel like mornings are not a battle of wills
- Inspires independence and accountability
- Turns kids into time self-managers
Practice:
You’ve prepared. You’re patient. Now it’s time to put it all into practice. Some kids are easier than others, and not every strategy will work, but through trial and error, you’ll find a good routine that works for your family.
- Set your routine to music. A favorite song or album is a great way to lighten a grumpy morning mood, and your kids might enjoy the fun of it.
- Establish a five-minute buffer. There’s nothing like a strategic fib to keep things moving. Tell your kids you need to leave five minutes before you actually do. Ding!
- Make a game of it and play on your kids’ imaginations! Challenge them to get ready while avoiding lava patches and shark-infested rooms. Admittedly, this one might be a bit hard to pull off, but if you can keep it lighthearted, you’ll be speaking their language.
Morning routines are all about solving problems. With some thoughtful preparation, patience and a lot of practice, along with some nifty parenting trick, they’re all totally solvable. There may not be time to play in the morning before school, but you can still keep it fun and lighthearted while getting out the door on schedule.
